Quest: To be secure
Theme: “You can count on me”
Focus of Attention: Being safe and secure. Attention naturally turns to worst case scenarios(envisioned in the mind) and the hidden motives of other people.
Fear: Being without support and guidance
Core Belief: The world is unsafe and full threats
Mental Habit: Experience fear and anxiety. I am filled with doubt and worry. I constantly change my mind
Miss the Mark: It is not okay to trust yourself. I either become paralyzed by my fear and do not move forward or I try to blast my way through the fear.
Coping Strategy: Look for something outside myself to believe in
Inner Messages: It’s not okay to be to trust yourself or others
• Am I prepared, ready for every emergency?
• Why did I say that?
• Why did she say that?
• What am I supposed to do?
• Will they take advantage of me?
• What if I don’t like it?
• Was I talking too much?
• Do I fit in?
• What are they thinking?
• That sounds sincere
• Could it be true?
• Are they just being polite?
• What aren’t they saying?
• What’s the full story?
• Why don’t they express there doubts?
At their Best: Vigilant, committed, cooperative, prepared, dutiful, warm, caring, witty, practical, helpful, responsible
At their Worst:hyper vigilant,controlling,unpredictable, judgmental,paranoid, defensive, rigid, self-defeating, testy
Challenge: being caught off guard and the misuse of authority, desire to protect and nurture can turn to smothering and over protectiveness, need for rules and structure can result in inflexible standards, being overly compliant or rebellious, can become scattered, and feel overwhelmed and resentful
Paradigm: I over exaggerate trying to be loyal and dependent or become rebellious to overcompensate for a limiting belief that I am a coward, I am living in a dangerous world.
A suspicious attitude usually elicits hostile or plotting behavior from others. Thinking that people are talking behind my back, gets people talking behind my back and only confirms that “the world is out to get you”
Gifts at the Highest Level: Trustworthy, courageous, self-reliant
- Listen to your desires and intuition, people do not always have answers for you.
- Do not jump to conslusions.
- Question your fears
- Do not barrage people with questions, ask fewer questions, talk about yourself before you question others.
- Do not go out looking for trouble especially when things are going well. You tend to lookout for security and safety concerns.
- Change your focus and look for the best in every situation.
- Learn to let go of the past and past mistrusts.
- Decide! some doubt and insecurity is natural. You will seldom be 100% sure all of the time.
- Observe how many times you use “What if” or “Yes but…” in your language
- Look to see where you withhold information from others
- Let go of some of your anxiety – it is stressful to over plan, over worry, over prepare and imagine the worst in every situation – it is exhausting to be constantly vigilant
- Participate in relaxation techniques – breathing, visualization, yoga, meditation – get out of your head into your body.